M&M Taste Tests, a series of delight and disgust

I was requested to do a taste test of the three new M&M’s flavors, Chilinut, Coffeenut, and Honeynut. The results are ravishing.

Chilinut M&M’s:

Holy devil on a stick. Okay, so this flavor took me by surprise. It’s kind of amazing that such a little sphere can hold so much disgust and unholiness. But really, let me describe this terrible process to you in excruciating detail.

So the color of the candy shell already showcases how gross this thing is. It honestly looks like a compressed pepper, which is a terrible sign in my opinion. Then you pop the M&M in your mouth and everything’s just dandy. You’re chewing and it just tastes like normal chocolate. You’re kinda liking it and then bam! This weird, artificial heat hits your tongue. You were so chill up until that point and now you want to cry; You realize your dreams are only dreams.

That Chilinut was one of the worst things I’ve ever tasted. Why would you take the sweetness from an M&M and replace it with the devil’s spit? That is the complete opposite of what you should be doing to M&M’s. You should be trying to make them even sweeter so dentists have a field day with kids’ cavities. Seriously, unless you like fake heat and chocolate covered peppers, don’t eat this. You’ll regret it.

Coffeenut M&M’s:

Alright so I don’t really like the taste of coffee to begin with, so I’m a bit more biased in this taste test. If you like coffee, I’m sure this one’s pretty good. So I don’t want to say don’t ever try this flavor, but for me, this tasting wasn’t a fun experience either.

This flavor wasn’t unbearable. It didn’t receive the reaction the Chilinut did, however, it was still so… odd. While chocolate and coffee go well together, this one started out tasting, again, like a normal M&M. It’s almost disappointing when you first start chewing because you’re preparing yourself for a coffee taste but it’s just normal chocolate at first. Then, like the Chilinut, the flavor hits you. It’s a typical coffee flavor, nothing too unique and special, but it still tasted artificial. It wasn’t the worst taste in the world, but to me, it still was not very good.

Honeynut M&M’s:

The Honeynut M&M’s were probably the best ones, but still very weird tasting. They weren’t bad, just surprising and oddly like Honey Nut Cheerios covered in chocolate. Which isn’t disgusting, since I think that’s a type of Cheerios or something. This flavor was just kind of disappointing. It was the same as the others – normal chocolate flavor at first, then the honey hits you. Not bad, just anticlimactic. The honey taste wasn’t strong, with the peanut inside the M&M taking the spotlight, even with the tiny little pieces I had.

Though the lack of a whole M&M could have had an effect on the taste and strength of some flavors, I still feel that the honey was weak. I was expecting much more of a Honey Nut Cheerios taste, but I barely got that. As I said before, this flavor isn’t bad, it’s just very weak and not much different from a normal Peanut M&M.